i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
