dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
