No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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