While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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