have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
