Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
