Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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