y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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