I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize