so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
