He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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