Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
