worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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