how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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