I showed him my bush... on skype.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Randomize
