I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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