That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
