Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Randomize
