She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
