She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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