WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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