There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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