Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
