So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
