i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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