I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Randomize
