You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize