i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
