yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize