is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
