Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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