Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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