Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
