take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
