Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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