I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize