Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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