I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize