i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
