Dual....:-)
no, he came in my armpit
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
