Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
