is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
