apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
