Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
