I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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