that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
There was a lot of him and a little penis
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
