your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
