so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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