Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
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It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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