I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
