I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
